What would you change?

What change would you like to make in your sexual attitudes or thoughts?

I struggled when I stumbled on this one. I tend to write these posts in the vein of brutal honesty,often to my own embarrassing detriment and given the mood I've been in today I wasn't sure I wanted to do that today. Sure I could have just skipped writing anything, wouldn't have been abnormal for me to miss a day or so right? Yet i decided against that,as I have slowly been trying to get back into the habit of daily or almost daily writing of some sort. Some days are obviously better then others. 

Either way, to the chosen topic at hand.....

I don't know if its really a change I want or just something that would be more convenient for me. I kinda wish I was less sexual. I would love it if less of my self worth was tied into my sexuality. I guess my blunt answer to the question is really I would change my sexual nature completely. I would change how often i do think about sex and how often I want it. There are times where I am truly envious of those who are asexual. There is actually times where I miss how damn depressed I was several years ago where I went almost 2 years with no need for sexual contact at all. I was depressed, but in alot of way hurt less. Which Im aware makes no sense to most people, but then again when the hell do I ever make sense to anyone?